Changes

Why are changes so scary. I could hardly sleep last night. I found myself tossing and turning. The kids seemed to sleep lightly, and before we knew it morning was upon us. I arose to a dark day with three kiddos to dress, breakfast to prep, and a rush to get out the door. In the mad rush we made it just in time. Grandma Sue was waiting, her house a welcome retreat of toys and kids. My kiddos immediately were happy. It felt great, safe, and wonderful. Still as the day rushed by I wondered about them. I worried even though I knew they were fine, and yes when I got there I crushed them in tight little hugs.

Its not so much about who is watching my kids as the fact that it isn't Eric or I. Sure we love having a clean house, instead of the crazy nuclear warfare that looks like a Toys-R-Us stomach flu in our living room. Sure it is great when they don't act stir crazy from not having left our house for days except to play in the yard. Sure we love that they get to play with other kids, but in the end we also have to consider the big picture.

Proverbs 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

If I am charged with this my duty as a parent, my job as a christian mom, and it is my calling then I have to wonder about school. Every hour they depart from my guidance especially at the age of 4 or 5 years old is an hour I am not training them, guiding them, and nurturing the morals I uphold. Every hour counts, every minute, and every day. So that is why I am so appalled by the media's coverage of our fearless leader's ideas for education. 9.5 hours not counting bus time for my kiddos away from me. That is 9.5 hours of someone else guiding them. Look at our schools we have some amazing teachers, but the government has pushed propaganda to be taught in states like MA and CA. The messages that come out of some classrooms are not the messages I want my 4 year old to hear. Take note more hours in school will not make my child better educated, because education is about a child as a whole. I don't just want my child to read, write, and do arithmetic. I want my children to be productive citizens. I want them to stand up for their moral values. Values that are not allowed in our schools. So if the schools say my kids have to be there, yet they cannot bring their beliefs to school. It seems like they are taking away my right as a parent to spend time raising my kids. Especially if you take away some of the summer, and Saturdays.

Psalm 127:3
Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.

Let us not forget our job as parents!
And I hear children's voices singing Of a God who heals and rescues and restores And I'm reminded That every child in Africa is Yours And its all Yours, God, Yours, God Everything is Yours From the stars in the sky To the depths of the ocean floor And its all Yours, God, Yours, God Everything is Yours You're the Maker and Keeper, Father and Ruler of everything It's all Yours

All in Good Time

It is so amazing the day I feared might never come has arrived. Eric has a job, a day job. It has been a very bumpy ride along the way. It all started over 3 years ago when we decided to move back to Montana. We gave up fabulous jobs, left our perfect little starter home, and moved back to Montana. It seemed like a great plan. Sure it was more expensive to live in Montana, sure houses cost three to five times as much, and there were very few good paying jobs. However, we were close to family. It would have been ideal if we could have afforded any of the sacrifices. Eventually we were forced to choose, we could stay in Montana without jobs or we could move to somewhere where there were jobs.

Of course at this point you are saying to yourself, jeez bonehead, who moves without a job. Not us, we had jobs, but in Montana they just didn't last. Who ever heard of a special education teacher being cut. You got it, only in Montana. Of course packing up and moving to Oklahoma seemed crazy and outrageous idea. We had never been to Oklahoma, we didn't know anyone there, but we were moving. Why you might ask? The cheapest cost of living in 50 states. Great school districts, a demand for teachers, job security, and 3 options for my masters degree. It all seemed to make sense.

So we packed up our tiny U-haul. Then we drove 22 hours and found ourselves in the south. The next couple of months ensued with me working at my new job which was amazing and Eric searching for a job! It seemed like nothing would ever work out. He kept applying and 1 application turned into 100, then 200, and still only 2 interviews. It seemed that we were stuck in the same vicious cycle, only now we lived thousands of miles away from our families. Finally, though it all fell into place with 4 interviews, and 3 job offers. So on Monday my children will head to daycare for the first time in 2 and a half years, my husband will head to work, and I will head to work. We won't be working opposite shifts, and pinching pennies to survive. We will finally share the same weekends too!

It amazes me sometimes that so many people go through life day in and day out without realizing the amazing blessings they have. It is only when you face adversity and have to climb a mountain that appears insurmountable that you discover your own mettle. I know that we could never have climbed this mountain without God by our side. For when I stumbled he caught me. When the load was to great to carry he lifted it off my shoulders, and when I found my faith tested he showed me the way. God achieves everything in his time. The hardest part is waiting, and trusting his will. If you can let go of everything you think that you know then you can finally see how blind you really are. Just ask Paul.

If you gotta start somewhere why not here
If you gotta start sometime why not now
If we gotta start somewhere I say here
If we gotta start sometime I say now
Through the fog there is hope in the distance
From cathedrals to third world missions
Love will fall to the earth like a crashing wave